About the Flash vs. Spider-Man thing...
Wally just had his identity retconned/secret--fied. ONLY that. His friends, villains, family...most importantly, his WIFE were left untouched/unchanged. Also, the secret from other heroes, it was all taken away/care of within a single issue. We didn't have to sit through craptacular stories/issues/events were Dick Grayson (Wally's best friend) didn't know who Wally and/or Flash was. Even Linda, who didn't know it (initally) came to know it pretty soon. And yes, that particular bit (those issues) were LAME. That particular part of the whole story was just dragged out uselessly. And lastly, the retcon didn't bring back some long gone dead character(s) from Wally's past.
Wally's lack of a secret identity was never a big problem...and his life hasn't changed much after it.
As for Spidey...
He's lost his WIFE. Doesn't even remember her (any of their time together, Pre- or Post-marriage), NOT AT ALL. None of his colleagues, friends, heck, even the few villains who knew it...remember the man below the mask. This includes his best friend(?) Matt Murdock. He's back to being the loser who lives in his aunt's basement and shoots his wad..ahem, webs, which btw are back to being mechanical. Then again, the biological shooters were brought in for/because of the movies. Now that the movie(s) are done and over, they're back to being mechanical. So 'power wise' its a step back too. (And I am not touching on the 'ability to interact with insects' bit). Also, from what I've heard, the retcon has also brought back deadies.
Lastly, even though Flash/Wally is a fairly big/famous/known DC character...he's nowhere near Spidey's levels. Not. Even. Close.
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